Running

I stepped out on my patio ready for this run. Looked up and saw the night sky, clouded with rain clouds. To rain or not to rain? I looked down at my running shoes and took the first step. That’s the hardest, isn’t that what they say?? As I ran I listened to Praise and Worship Songs. As the songs picked up pace, I picked up the pace too. It felt great, breathing in the night air, running, just God and I.  And as I listened to the words of the songs, I had a conversation or two with God about His Word and My Life.

I told Him how I spoke the scripture “I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me” during the numerous boot camps I did. (as if He didn’t know) How when I was running and my legs started to hurt, I would speak it over and over again, and how I felt Him there with me, and how I felt him physically strengthen me. I could sense him smile remembering those moments. As the conversations changed I told Him about other times that I had felt Him with me, in times of trouble. And we talked about the scripture that says.. "A very present help in a time of trouble. . ." Trouble.  We all face it one time or another.

My legs started to itch. I always know when they start to itch its because the blood flow is running so fast thru my legs. And its then that I have to press on.  My breathing increased, I drifted from my conversation with God and thought about the itching of my legs, “don’t start itching” I keep telling myself, if I start I won’t stop itching and I won’t be able to finish this run.

Then God said “A present help”. Present. Right now, in this moment. So, I asked God Right now please help me to keep running, please take this pain away. I began to listen to the song playing on my Ipod, Our God Is Greater, Our God is Stronger…… and I strayed off thinking of How Great My God Was. I felt a smile come on my face, and without noticing it, my pace picked up. Running, Singing, thinking on God’s Greatness. Present. With me. Right here, right now, not leaving nor forsaking. The word just went round and round in my head - maybe the heat was getting to me. Maybe the verse was sinking in. Just wanting to be in be in His presence and so I ran on.

I thought of my life, thought of running, from where I came and hence I am, and where I will be tomorrow…I thought of running this race called life. I thought about how my life has been filled with good and bad times. Times of Happiness and Times of Sorrow. It wasn’t easy, but was it supposed to be? I thought about the troubles and how they pushed me. They have me running to Him over and over again. What if I never had troubles…would I need Him so deeply?

I thought of my childhood and my children’s childhood, and how I prayed I could keep the enemy from fighting them, and how I could make all their days troublefree. And then I thought…. but now do I really want that? Do I want them blinded to their need for God, never experiencing His present, promised, needed help in times of trouble? Am I prepared to watch them struggle through this life like I have? Am I preparing them for the battle that they are already facing and what lies ahead?

I felt the tears began to flow and before I knew it, I was crying. Running, crying, and all the while I felt God there, and could sense Him nodding His head in understanding. I don’t want my kids to have to go thru what I went thru and how I would do anything, sacrifice anything, to keep them from trouble.  And God said “me too”, and the tears came harder, and before I knew it I was sobbing. And it hit me…..He did just that for me….He sacrificed everything, Jesus, He sacrificed it all, so I wouldn’t have to go thru what He did.

John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life

Thankfulness came over me, and although I’ve always known, I began to feel such gratitude for what He did for me and feel how He felt for me, His child. And how so many times, He has been there, Present as I go thru trouble, some caused by my own actions, and He never Left me. And God said, remember this when it comes to your children. I felt foolish for ever thinking I could control trouble in their lives. And I thought back on trouble in my life, and I was brought to “a time (a season) for everything.”  Ecc 3:1, To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. A purpose. A purpose for pain, for sorrow….gosh that’s hard to grasp. Especially when referring to my babies.

My running had stopped, and I found myself on the side of the sidewalk hunched over still crying. I felt the blood rushing to my head, so I raised up and looked into the night sky. A very present help, in a time of trouble. A very present help, in a time of trouble, I kept repeating. I started walking, and started talking to Him again. And in my pleas of I don’t know if I can, and what if’s…..God said, I will be there for them and you then……just as I have been there for you. I must have been holding my breath, because I felt myself exhale…..and all the worries went away. And it wasn’t that I ever doubted it, it’s just sometimes you have to get it out and hear “its ok”.  I looked at where I was, and though I normally slowed to a walk at a certain point, I had gone all the way running. And although it may seem small to some, I smiled knowing I had not scratched my legs one time.

And this is the song I thought of:

http://youtu.be/wKAM4TvcQC0

As I stood there thinking on the words to this song, “You’ve Become My Joy and Song…..” I couldn’t help but be thankful that God has not given up on me. I will have troubles in this life, and so will my children. But I can face tomorrow knowing that He is ever present. Knowing His presence is just a taste of heaven here on earth and it has me starving for eternity with him. Running….To Him.

I pray this encourages you today friends, put everything that hinders you aside, and Run to Him.